Tantra was following me into life

female humita premmiela tantra the female way Mar 22, 2022

I came out of a long relationship, 13 years. And my friend said in a couple of days, they will host a tantric workshop. That sounds like something perfectly for you. I said, why? He's like, "well, off the 13 years,  you know, you ended up into patterns and you might feel stuck and don't know where to start, blah, blah, blah." And I walked back to my room that night, chewing on this whole tantric thing. Thoughts in my head saying;  No, I cannot do that. It's something completely out of my league. -  And that's a nice feeling from the thoughts of tantra. It was something dark, something, very sexual, animal like, sex. I had all kinds of judgments and ideas around it, but one thing first and foremost, that it was not something for me. 


During my trip in Asia, I got confronted with tantra several times in various ways. I moved to another place. I was working in an orphan house, teaching English to kids. And there again, it was tantra.  Yes, it was true coming out of a long relationship. I felt a longing for a new way of freedom. I felt a longing for a new chapter in my life. Yes, my heart was in pain and I needed some healing for sure. 


Until that moment I couldn't ignore it anymore. There was tantra again. I was together with a beautiful Indian yoga teacher, 10 years younger, the perfect rebound. He introduced me to a Dutch man Practicing Tai-Chi at the Arambol. I was mesmerized by his aura, his energy and. The man, I think he was like 80, 85. And he had such a young vibe. He invited us for his tantra workshop that morning. And there I was, I found myself with 50 other beautiful souls. Outside, under the trees, right after the first meditation. I exploded out of love. I felt sensations. I've never felt this way before. It was coming home in my body saying fully yes to life.

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